Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
