I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
