The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
My nipple is on Facebook.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
