I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
no more duck duck goose at the bar
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
