im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
