Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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