Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Why did my mother make you get naked?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
