their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
