Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
