He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Randomize
