But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize