btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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