how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
pray to the hookup gods
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize