i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Randomize