i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
