I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
