: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Randomize
