I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
did i just pee glitter
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