I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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