i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize
