so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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