Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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