i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Are we still banned from the library?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
