Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
