I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Randomize
