she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
