She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
