she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
