For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Randomize