you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
