I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Randomize
