he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
My cat gives me a boner
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
