Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
You have to summon your inner elephant
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Randomize
