forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
