With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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