He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
