I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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