just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
