hotel room ftw
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
