The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
