I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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