I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
