fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
