Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
