I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
