:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Randomize
