Your tits are I can't wait for
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize