before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
