I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
stop calling my apartment porn island.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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