there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
