Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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